consulting-idjits-in-the-tardis:
[AGGRESSIVELY GETS THE MILK]
Best.
John I am so done with you I am going to GO GET THE FUCKING MILK YOU LITTLE BITCH.
guys i tried to reblog it from the top picture
(via voyagesofabookworm)
Science and Faith
"Let us read, and let us dance; these two amusements will never do any harm to the world" -Voltaire
Dancer. Avid Castle fan. Certified Book Nerd. Ekat. Erudite (;
Dancer. Avid Castle fan. Certified Book Nerd. Ekat. Erudite (;
I should really be studying right now. 😑
(Source: kurtdevon, via portugoose)
when we were kids the only thing that got us through most days was music. its why we started fall out boy in the first place. . this isn’t a reunion because we never broke up. we needed to plug back in and make some music that matters to us.
the future of fall out boy starts now.
save rock and roll…
pete, patrick, andy, and joe.Download “My Songs Know What You Did In The Dark (Light Em Up)” on iTunes.
Save Rock and Roll out May 6th & 7th worldwide, pre-order here.TOUR DATES
2/4 Chicago, IL @ Subterranean (On Sale 9am CST)
2/5 New York, NY @ Studio at Webster Hall (On Sale 10am EST)
2/7 Los Angeles, CA @ The Roxy (On Sale 10am PST)
2/25 London, UK @ Underworld
2/27 Paris, FR @ Nouveau Casino
3/1 Berlin, DE @ Bi Nuu
3/25 Sydney, AUS @ Metro Theatre
3/27 Melbourne, AUS @ Palace Theatre
SAVE ROCK AND ROLL TOUR
on sale February 8th & 9th
5/14/13 - Milwaukee, WI @ Rave
5/16/13 - Chicago, IL @ Riviera Theatre
5/17/13 - Columbus, OH @ LC Pavilion
5/21/13 - Pittsburgh, PA @ Stage AE
5/22/13 - Detroit, MI @ The Fillmore
5/24/13 - Toronto, ON @ Sound Academy
5/25/13 - Montreal QC @ Metropolis
5/26/13 - Boston, MA @ House of Blues
5/28/13 - Niagara Falls, NY @ Rapids Theatre
5/29/13 - New York, NY @ Terminal 5
5/30/13 - Philadelphia, PA @ Electric Factory
5/31/13 - Washington, DC @ 9:30 Club
6/01/13 - Charlotte, NC @ Fillmore Charlotte
6/02/13 - Atlanta, GA @ The Tabernacle
6/04/13 - Lake Buena Vista, FL @ House of Blues
6/05/13 - Miami Beach, FL @ Fillmore
6/07/13 - Houston, TX @ Bayou Music Center
6/08/13 - Dallas, TX @ Palladium Ballroom
6/09/13 - Austin, TX @ Stubb’s Waller Creek Amphitheatre
6/11/13 - Tempe, AZ @ Marquee Theatre
6/13/13 - Los Angeles, CA @ The Wiltern
6/15/13 - Las Vegas, NV @ House of Blues
6/16/13 - Oakland, CA @ Fox Theater
6/18/13 - Portland, OR @ Roseland Theatre
6/19/13 - Seattle, WA @ Showbox SoDo
6/20/13 - Vancouver, BC @ Commodore Ballroom
6/22/13 - Salt Lake City, UT @ In The Venue
6/23/13 - Denver, CO @ Ogden Theatre
6/25/13 - Kansas City, MO @ Uptown Theatre
6/26/13 - St Paul, MN @ Myth
6/28/13 - St Louis, MO @ Pageant
6/29/13 - Indianapolis, IN @ Egyptian Room at Old National
6/30/13 - Nashville, TN @ Ryman AuditoriumEvery dotcoms refreshing for a journal update.
(Source: falloutboy)
Reasons Why I’m Single and Probably Never Going to Date
Dear Dumb Diary (HAH! Get it? It’s a reference to my favorite childhood book),
Once again, I have no one to talk to on Twitter so I turn to you. As I was scrolling down through posts on Facebook, I felt the need to somehow contemplate my life. So I cuddled my favorite pillow in bed, closed my eyes and started thinking. I thought of my favorite rom-com movies and chick-lit novels. I know they give unrealistic expectations from relationships, which led me to the realization that maybe that is why I’m single. That and because I’m introverted, my parents don’t allow me to be in a relationship, and I have a knack for being attracted to guys who like guys. I mean, who wants to be alone? Okay, one by one now.
My favorite past times include reading books and watching TV. I spend my time shamelessly squealing when a guy does this grand gesture to show the girl his undying love and devotion. I want to take Drew Barrymore’s place in the plane when Adam Sandler sang Grow Old with You in The Wedding Singer. Or her again when she played Lucy in 50 First Dates even if she was an amnesiac. Oh how I would cry buckets of tears if the Beach Boys’ Wouldn’t It Be Nice becomes my theme song with that special someone. Or or or Kate Beckinsale as Sara in Serendipity when she met Jonathan (John Cusack) in the department store. Yes, I’d be willing to lose a hardbound copy of Love in the Time of Cholera for a complete stranger if it means meeting the one. I, too, like the word “serendipity”. And who wouldn’t give anything to have a guy like Cooper Cartwright from Meg Cabot’s Heather Wells Mystery Series? The guy would do just about anything to keep Heather safe. I can drone on and on, but the point is that it’s universally accepted that guys like them don’t exist. If they do, they’re probably taken (lucky girls). I don’t think a guy would ever be willing to stage a flash mob dance at Grand Central Station for me. Although I’d like that. A lot.
Next is my timorous characteristic. So far, no guy has ever liked me, much less shown it through his actions. None. Zero. Which then leads me to another realization: I’m a forever alone girl. And I’m not one of those who are desperately searching for attention. I actually mean that. Heck, the guy I like doesn’t even know I exist. I’m too shy to talk to him and talking to boys in general gives me tremors. I’m a boring companion, a pointless speaker. The only time I ever come close to really knowing a guy is when I Facebook stalk him (yes, I am unashamed to admit it.) The thing is, I’m dull. There’s nothing special or fun about me. The only time I actually become a decent conversation partner is when the topic is about books or movie stars (whom I also stalk) So basically, I’m unattractive in all aspects- physically, socially and maybe even mentally
And then there are my parents. They’re strict. I’m not allowed to date. Otherwise, they’ll throw me out of the house. Literally. I’m not the least bit threatened, but I follow them because I see their point. Studies should come first. That and because no one really asks me out.
I will not further comment on my attraction toward gay guys. I personally don’t know either. I mean, how was I supposed to know I’m not his type gender-wise? Geez.
To sum it all up, I am a hopeless romantic. I remember reading a Sophie Kinsella book during Math class back in second year. I had no clue what sir was talking about until I realized the whole class was staring at me. He jokingly mentioned something about girls reading pocketbooks all the time and that they’re practically “hopeless romatics”, so naturally, they all look at me. There’s nothing wrong, really. I thank him for “coining” the term. I wasn’t the least bit offended. I’m more than prepared to spend the rest of my life in the company of my books and 10 future cats. Worry not future neighbors for I will not be a grumpy old lady.
Oh yeah. This is supposed to be addressed to you, my “diary”. Thank you for uhm, listening(?) Farewell for now for I will enjoy my single-blessedness together with my Physics book which I completely neglected.
Your dumb author,
Ruth
P.S. I didn’t want to be a Scrooge, so I stopped there.
| Book: | I will be one of the best things you read this year. |
|---|---|
| Book: | You will fall in love with my characters. |
| Book: | I'm so good, you'll lose sleep over me. |
| Book: | I'm part of a series. |
| Book: | So you can feel the pain of a character dying in each book. |
| Book: | I will break you emotionally. |
| Book: | I will make you forget the real world. |
| Book: | I will ruin all potential future love interests for you. |
| Book: | You will be emotionally attached to me. |
| Book: | You are mine. |
20 ways to survive in a horror movie.
A quick run-down should you ever find yourself trapped in a horror movie and would prefer to live to tell the tale.
1. Don’t have sex.
- Seriously
- Abstinence is key.
2. Don’t go out with people you’ve just met that day.
- I don’t care how good he says his weed is
- he is cuckoo bananas
- and he wants you dead.
3. Don’t go to camp. Especially one where someone was murdered.
- There are six words you should YouTube, should you get the chance
- “Kevin Bacon in Friday the 13th”
4. Find a good hiding place and… STAY. THERE.
- If the killer can’t see you or hear you WHY WOULD YOU MOVE?
- Possibly the easiest rule to follow and, ironically enough, the easiest to break.
5. Always wear sensible shoes, ‘cause you never know when you’ll need to run through the woods.
- Someone will always be barefoot
- Or in heels
- Or just plain clumsy
- And will sprain their ankles
- And die.
6. If the town looks deserted, it’s probably because everyone is dead.
- Don’t walk around looking for people
- House of Wax, anyone?
7. Don’t be a hero.
- Unless you’re name is Harry Fucking Potter, you will die.
- Hell, maybe even then.
- I mean.
8. If you hear something creepy in the distance, like a dog’s yelp cut off mid-bark, don’t investigate.
- The killer is there.
- Also your dog is dead.
9. Always check the backseat before entering your vehicle.
- The last thing you need is to be killed while trying to merge on the expressway.
10. If your car breaks down in front of a dilapidated gas station, don’t ask a sketchy-looking townie for help.
- Some part of your body will wind up in his pick-up truck
11. Don’t go into the basement.
- They are creepy enough without you dying in one.
12. If you’re trying to buy a house and the real estate agent won’t answer any direct questions about either the history of the home or the previous tenants, DO NOT MOVE IN.
- At some point, someone in the house heard voices and cracked.
13. Turn off the television (and run away) if a girl crawls out of it.
- It is obviously your wisest choice.
- SEE ALSO: poltergeist, daughter trapped in tv because of.
14. If the walls of your house bleed, do not attempt an exorcism.
- Move very very far away
- Because there’s blood on your walls.
- Blood.
- Your
- Walls
- Are
- Bleeding.
15. Don’t act like a detective.
- Some crazy Japanese kid who meows like a cat will attack you in a closet.
- If you live, awesome story to tell your friend, right?
- But if you die, it is like the opposite of awesome.
16. Google the location you’ll be vacationing at.
- If more than five reports for “Missing Persons” pops up, you know not to go there.
- Issue. Solved.
17. Don’t get drunk. Or come under the influence of any mind-altering drug.
- Running away from a killer is that much harder when you’re tipsy and giggling.
18. If you see someone in a mask, don’t assume it’s one of your friends playing a trick on you to scare you.
- It is the killer.
- ALSO: laughing while saying, “Tommy, is that you in that stupid mask? Oh, I’m so-o-o-o-o scared!” is not conducive to your surviving.
- Killers are very sensitive about their disguises.
19. Don’t take a shower.
- ONLY APPLIES IF:
- It’s past midnight at the campground you and your sorority sisters are staying at or
- The lock to the door doesn’t work and you hear creepy piano music
AND THE LAST AND MOST IMPORTANT:
20. If the call is coming from inside the house, get out.
- Clearly the killer is not outside, now is he
4 months ago - 
134167
134167 20 ways to survive in a horror movie.
A quick run-down should you ever find yourself trapped in a horror movie and would prefer to live to tell the tale.
1. Don’t have sex.
- Seriously
- Abstinence is key.
2. Don’t go out with people you’ve just met that day.
- I don’t care how good he says his weed is
- he is cuckoo bananas
- and he wants you dead.
3. Don’t go to camp. Especially one where someone was murdered.
- There are six words you should YouTube, should you get the chance
- “Kevin Bacon in Friday the 13th”
4. Find a good hiding place and… STAY. THERE.
- If the killer can’t see you or hear you WHY WOULD YOU MOVE?
- Possibly the easiest rule to follow and, ironically enough, the easiest to break.
5. Always wear sensible shoes, ‘cause you never know when you’ll need to run through the woods.
- Someone will always be barefoot
- Or in heels
- Or just plain clumsy
- And will sprain their ankles
- And die.
6. If the town looks deserted, it’s probably because everyone is dead.
- Don’t walk around looking for people
- House of Wax, anyone?
7. Don’t be a hero.
- Unless you’re name is Harry Fucking Potter, you will die.
- Hell, maybe even then.
- I mean.
8. If you hear something creepy in the distance, like a dog’s yelp cut off mid-bark, don’t investigate.
- The killer is there.
- Also your dog is dead.
9. Always check the backseat before entering your vehicle.
- The last thing you need is to be killed while trying to merge on the expressway.
10. If your car breaks down in front of a dilapidated gas station, don’t ask a sketchy-looking townie for help.
- Some part of your body will wind up in his pick-up truck
11. Don’t go into the basement.
- They are creepy enough without you dying in one.
12. If you’re trying to buy a house and the real estate agent won’t answer any direct questions about either the history of the home or the previous tenants, DO NOT MOVE IN.
- At some point, someone in the house heard voices and cracked.
13. Turn off the television (and run away) if a girl crawls out of it.
- It is obviously your wisest choice.
- SEE ALSO: poltergeist, daughter trapped in tv because of.
14. If the walls of your house bleed, do not attempt an exorcism.
- Move very very far away
- Because there’s blood on your walls.
- Blood.
- Your
- Walls
- Are
- Bleeding.
15. Don’t act like a detective.
- Some crazy Japanese kid who meows like a cat will attack you in a closet.
- If you live, awesome story to tell your friend, right?
- But if you die, it is like the opposite of awesome.
16. Google the location you’ll be vacationing at.
- If more than five reports for “Missing Persons” pops up, you know not to go there.
- Issue. Solved.
17. Don’t get drunk. Or come under the influence of any mind-altering drug.
- Running away from a killer is that much harder when you’re tipsy and giggling.
18. If you see someone in a mask, don’t assume it’s one of your friends playing a trick on you to scare you.
- It is the killer.
- ALSO: laughing while saying, “Tommy, is that you in that stupid mask? Oh, I’m so-o-o-o-o scared!” is not conducive to your surviving.
- Killers are very sensitive about their disguises.
19. Don’t take a shower.
- ONLY APPLIES IF:
- It’s past midnight at the campground you and your sorority sisters are staying at or
- The lock to the door doesn’t work and you hear creepy piano music
AND THE LAST AND MOST IMPORTANT:
20. If the call is coming from inside the house, get out.
- Clearly the killer is not outside, now is he
(via martianfemale-earthlingmale)
4 months ago - 134167
134167 
